Alyssa is from the woods of Connecticut, lives in New York City’s East Village and works in tech PR at a digital agency in Brooklyn. It’s safe to assume she’s always at least half-joking. Hate mail, bad PR pitches and offers of riches can be sent to woodlandcreatureblog at gmail. These opinions are hers alone and do not reflect the views of her employer, clients or mom. Nobody pays her to write about products or gives her free stuff, but it’d be cool if they did. var _gaq = _gaq || []; _gaq.push(['_setAccount', 'UA-5112204-2']); _gaq.push(['_trackPageview']); (function() { var ga = document.createElement('script'); ga.type = 'text/javascript'; ga.async = true; ga.src = ('https:' == document.location.protocol ? 'https://ssl' : 'http://www') + '.google-analytics.com/ga.js'; var s = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(ga, s); })(); __compete_code = '1e293eb427c40d20946c996ed45a3a3a'; (function () { var s = document.createElement('script'), e = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0], t = document.location.protocol.toLowerCase() === 'https:' ? 'https://c.compete.com/bootstrap/' : 'http://c.compete.com/bootstrap/'; s.src = t + __compete_code + '/bootstrap.js'; s.type = 'text/javascript'; s.async = true; if (e) { e.parentNode.insertBefore(s, e); } }()); Tumblr (3.0; @woodlandcreature)http://woodlandcreature.com/<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4nihjkmmV1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>I’m their best friend they just happened to create. (They’re bad at smizing.) (Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23822916051http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23822916051Sat, 26 May 2012 18:29:43 -0400<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4ms0k6wWA1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Best 50 cents I ever spent! I love tag sales. (Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23792946980http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23792946980Sat, 26 May 2012 08:57:55 -0400<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4mrc42oNi1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>The new Galella family beach cottage. Lemme know if you want to rent it. ;) (Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23792503810http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23792503810Sat, 26 May 2012 08:43:16 -0400“Once there was a man who dreamt he ate a giant marshmallow and when he woke up, his pillow was gone.”<br/><br/> - <em>My favorite joke, when I was a kid</em>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23771778723http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23771778723Fri, 25 May 2012 22:31:02 -0400jokesnostalgia<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4lmblbRjo1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Heading to the Cape with my parents in this thing. Dad: “We look like The Beverly Hillbillies.” (Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23755003319http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23755003319Fri, 25 May 2012 17:57:21 -0400<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4lifaQ5c31qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Front door (not mine, I swear) on Avenue B. #eastvillage (Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23749986126http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23749986126Fri, 25 May 2012 16:33:10 -0400eastvillage<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4jfgzGv5m1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><blockquote> <p>“I want to know if my hair is just like yours,” he told Mr. Obama, so quietly that the president asked him to speak again.</p> <p>Jacob did, and Mr. Obama replied, “Why don’t you touch it and see for yourself?” He lowered his head, level with Jacob, who hesitated.</p> <p>“Touch it, dude!” Mr. Obama said.</p> <p>As Jacob patted the presidential crown, Mr. Souza snapped.</p> <p>“So, what do you think?” Mr. Obama asked.</p> <p>“Yes, it does feel the same,” Jacob said.</p> </blockquote> <p>“<a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2012/05/24/us/politics/indelible-image-of-a-boys-pat-on-obamas-head-hangs-in-white-house.html" target="_blank">Awww</a>” of the Day.</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23678633624http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23678633624Thu, 24 May 2012 13:34:11 -0400obamacutekids<iframe width="400" height="225" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/ag9fAN3YfyI?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p><strong>“Older Brother” - Pepper Rabbit</strong></p> <p>This song breaks my heart a little.</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23646667172http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23646667172Wed, 23 May 2012 21:49:40 -0400musicpepper rabbit<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4i1yxz8zA1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>What should I tell people this is the <a href="http://fab.com/sale/4932/product/2764/gx30vg/?fref=product-invite-tw" target="_blank">key</a> to?</p> <p>(Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23637621369http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23637621369Wed, 23 May 2012 19:44:00 -0400jewelrykeysnecklaces<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4i15lahUT1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Important.</p> <p>(Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23636393634http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23636393634Wed, 23 May 2012 19:27:00 -0400east villagenycbarssignsgrammarLOL<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4hs86QUMU1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Oxymoron?</p> <p>(Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23623715085http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23623715085Wed, 23 May 2012 16:14:00 -0400social mediamagazines“Being single takes a lot of time. There’s no one else to pick up milk or take out the recycling on the right day or wait at home for the plumber. It’s just you.”<br/><br/> - <em>“<a href="https://findings.com/article/59984-single-and-stepping-off-the-fast-track-w" target="_blank">Single and Stepping Off the Fast Track</a>” in <em>The Wall Street Journal</em> (via <a href="http://fnd.gs/Kpex0I" target="_blank">Findings.com</a>)</em>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23615791733http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23615791733Wed, 23 May 2012 13:34:00 -0400singledomlifequotes<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4hdu2dQ1v1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Tom Cruise is really working hard to tamp down those <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Cruise#Litigation" target="_blank">gay rumors</a>, huh? There’s also an <a href="http://www.wmagazine.com/celebrities/2012/06/tom-cruise-rock-of-ages-cover-story-ss#slide=1" target="_blank">amazing slideshow</a>.</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23610117556http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23610117556Wed, 23 May 2012 11:03:37 -0400tom cruiseLOLcelebs<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4h9mvzTVZ1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>New obsession: Starbucks spinach feta wrap. So good, only about 300 calories. (Check out more <a href="http://woodlandcreature.com/tagged/yummy_diet_food" target="_blank">yummy diet food</a>!)</p> <p>(Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23607366635http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23607366635Wed, 23 May 2012 09:32:00 -0400starbucksfoodyummy diet food<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4dz6e4jkn1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>How freaking adorable is this monkey. That’s not even a question.</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23491187191http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23491187191Mon, 21 May 2012 14:54:14 -0400monkeysanimalscute<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4dlpu9wbF1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Monsoon Monday morning in Manhattan. Must be our penance for such a lovely weekend.</p> <p>(Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23479320489http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23479320489Mon, 21 May 2012 10:03:00 -0400nycmidtownrain<a href="http://jezebel.com/5911208/a-cupcake-is-never-just-a-cupcake-the-psycho+sexuality-of-a-twee-treat">A Cupcake Is Never Just a Cupcake: The Psycho-Sexuality of a Twee Treat</a>: <p>Iiiiii meeeeean, really?! Girls love <a href="http://woodlandcreature.com/tagged/cupcakes" target="_blank">cupcakes</a> because they are adorable and delicious and practical. (What is a single girl gonna do with an entire damn cake? Either eat it all in an inordinately brief amount of time and then purge—whether on purpose or not—<em>or</em> keep to a sensible one-slice-a-day limit until it gets too melty and stale to even finish it.) And, not like they’re gonna create Pinterest boards and get tattoos about it, but I’ve never met a dude who turned down a cupcake. Just shut the hell up and eat the damn thing.</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23454516344http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23454516344Sun, 20 May 2012 21:39:00 -0400cupcakesfood<iframe width="400" height="225" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/EH2Bpl42WXo?wmode=transparent&autohide=1&egm=0&hd=1&iv_load_policy=3&modestbranding=1&rel=0&showinfo=0&showsearch=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br/><br/><p>My life <a href="http://woodlandcreature.com/post/19880461768/faceblogging" target="_blank">really</a> <a href="http://woodlandcreature.com/post/22955115574/tonights-injury-why-cant-i-stay-upright" target="_blank">is</a> a bad <a href="http://www.nerve.com/movies/beautiful-brunettes-falling-down-a-short-film" target="_blank">romantic comedy</a>, I guess. As my beloved <a href="http://woodlandcreature.com/tagged/the_wombats" target="_blank">Wombats</a> say, if this is a romcom, <a href="http://open.spotify.com/track/6uhvuMDb93ANzVxNABDgf1" target="_blank">kill the director</a>…</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23446062590http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23446062590Sun, 20 May 2012 19:27:00 -0400lifemoviesvideo<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4c4j3RzEf1qznybeo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>It’s so nice of Gap to feature these conjoined twins in an ad.</p> <p>(Taken with <a href="http://instagr.am" target="_blank">instagram</a>)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23429066565http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23429066565Sun, 20 May 2012 14:54:00 -0400nyceast villageGapfashionadvertisingadsLOLconjoined twins<a href="http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2012/05/three-arrested-in-alleged-chicago-terror-plot.html">Three People Arrested in Alleged Chicago Terror Plot</a>: <p>At least they were arrested before they accidentally blew up somebody’s house. Have we learned nothing from <a href="http://chelseanow.com/articles/2007/10/26/chelseanow_archives/20071026-archive11.txt" target="_blank">our generational forebears</a>, you crazy kids?! (Also, violence, never the answer.)</p>http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23424317288http://woodlandcreature.com/post/23424317288Sun, 20 May 2012 13:39:04 -0400terrorismanarchistsWTFcrimeweather underground