April 2009
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Weird Realization: I Went to College with Lady...
I was reading an article about Lady Gaga today, and it mentioned that her real name is Stefani Germanotta, which rang a bell with me for some reason. It turns out she was in the same year as me at NYU, and I definitely remember seeing posters up in the dorms for her shows at local bars. I also remember seeing people I knew in the Facebook group “Stefani Germanotta Is Going to Be Famous and I...
March 2009
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“There’s nothing against the rules about declaring an alcove a magic...”
– NYU spokesman John Becker, on my freshman dorm
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WatchMy family had a pet betta fish named Taz when I was little. He died when my mom, brother and I went on vacation and my dad stayed home because he had to work. Apparently, Taz committed suicide, because my dad said he found him on the kitchen floor when he got home from work one night. Coincidentally, my cat Gretna also died when the three of us were away on vacation. The moral of this story? Do...
Come On, Lighten Up, I'm Just Being A Total... →
Talk about not having a sense of humor. These days you can’t even sit down, rudely interrupt someone’s conversation, insult them directly to their face, and then act like a complete and utter asshole without people getting super offended by it. It’s like, Christ—lighten up, will you? All I did was show up and ruin everybody’s evening.
Come on, people, relax.
I just...
Everything Taking Too Long →
WASHINGTON—An overwhelming sense of restlessness and impatience engulfed the U.S. this week when citizens determined that everything—the morning commute, phone conversations, getting a table at Chili’s, making coffee, commercial breaks, everything—was taking entirely too long.
“This is ridiculous,” said Boston resident Joe Sosnoff, waiting for a subway train running behind...
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You don't like killer robot movies?
Girl: What scene was your boyfriend filming today?
Friend: This scene with a crazy robot and a machine gun...
Girl: Oh, so we're not going to see this movie, then.
Redneck and Scary
I am obsessed with Redneck and Single. I feel like these profiles have to be fake.
gittinpressed says:
i’M INTO EATIN CHICKEN I LIKE MOVIES AND WOMENS AND MY RECORDS GOT EXPUNGED SO THERE AINT GOT NO RESTRAINING ORDERS ON ME NO MAAM! GET ER DONE OH YEAH I DRIVE A NISSAN.
It all sounded good to me until he mentioned the Nissan. Although I’m kind of wondering what his other hobbies...
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“People who still think ‘The Freedom Tower’ is a good name for the...”
– Alex Pareene
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Let's talk: Wife handcuffs herself to husband →
Gosh, my home state has been getting such a bad rap in the news lately — first, a chimpanzee that rips people’s faces off, then the AIG-holes, and now a crazy lady that handcuffs herself to her husband and bites him. I swear our little state ain’t so bad!
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Oh No, Performers Coming Into Audience →
Audience members at the Benedum Center for the Performing Arts are reporting that, oh God, no, approximately 20 extremely enthusiastic actors are approaching the edge of the stage and appear determined to continue their current musical number in the main seating area….
Jesus Christ, one actor just did a jumping toe-touch from the stage into the audience, pumped his fist, and high-fived a...
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“You are not allowed to ask a woman about her pregnancy unless you physically see...”
– The Bloggess
What a lovely coinkydink
I ate ravioli at Lil’ Frankie’s on National Ravioli Day! And I didn’t even know I was celebrating.
I bet Typealyzer cheats
Typealyzer says my blog is an ISTJ, just like me! I think Typealyzer just read this blog post.
gifparty:
My mom’s cat Calvin totally does this.
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A Face Not Even a Mother Could Love →
Dear Prudence,
My boyfriend and I are in a healthy and loving relationship, and we are beginning to talk about marriage. We both want the same number of kids at the same point in our lives. It is presumed that these will be our biological children. The issue is, I’m not sure that I would want to bear my boyfriend’s children. While he is incredibly intelligent and has a great...